Variations on the same theme

I can't post this in my own because I'll too far behind in fic, but here's a prompt if you choose to accept it:

Firefly
Wash and Mal
Bickering over any of the following things:
~the most recent live animal cargo
~spoon usage
~the color of Wash's shirt
~who has to sit next to Jayne

Bring in other crew members as needed. Please, no characters outside the crew.

I think this should be interesting.... ;)