What Would Joss Do?

[fan_elune]

Yes, we survived Serenity, hard though it was to withstand the sight of all those amazing guests together. Let me just run through them: the shiny Nathan Fillion, the lovely Jewel Staite, the ever so shy Summer Glau, the hilarious Alan Tudyk, the so very handsome Ron Glass, the lovely Morena Baccarin, the browncoat Mark Sheppard and the best surprise of all, Chris Buchanan.

What do you mean, who?

Chris used to be the president of Mutant Enemy, Joss's production company. He was also one of the producers of Firefly and is the executive producer of Serenity. And he happens to be a great guy. No, seriously. He's funny, interesting, friendly, passionate, and, point of interest, rather handsome.

Anyway. Before you go on, do know that the level of spoilers for Serenity in the upcoming rant will be equal to that in the trailer. You're warned.

First off, let me introduce the players. the_swordman and heikki_cheren were the ones we totally robbed the hotel with shared a room with. In the car with us was also Rosie (whose username I don't have, sorry), and her con-partner was Tessa (also unknown username... I'm bad!). At the con we met up with fellow CoRo fans grimma and Sabine, Elisa and grimma's brother Guillaume.

We got there Friday afternoon and discovered the joys of how disrespectful of con attendees the hotel was. Everybody told me that a con was mostly about waiting, but we never waited as much as to get our bloody room. Anyhoot. We finally did get it, and surprise, it was a double room. Seems they don't have single rooms, they just rent double rooms as single rooms. So we actually had lots of room. (And the good thing is, they ended up only charging us for a single room, even though we had two breakfasts, two room keys, etc. Heh.) Some of us also bought pictures to be signed by the actors.

We got pretty good seats for the opening ceremony, which was really nice. Everybody was wondering about who the unannounced guest was – everybody knew about Ron, but we knew there was someone else. It turned out to be Mark Sheppard – imagine my happiness! I love Badger. And when he started talking in his cockney accent... Anyway. Jewel was also a surprise – Joey fell in lust with her and I just could not dissociate her from Kirsten Dunst. She talks like her, she has the same sort of looks... but I think it's just me. Anyway. Nathan was Nathan (and came back for a second entrance he had enjoyed the first one so much), Alan was Alan, Summer was the shyest little girl ever and I will not get over her voice! You guys have to realise, I adored Summer. I thought she was the most beautiful woman on the cast, despite her skeletonish looks, so that's saying a lot. But she started talking and – I have a thing for voices. Voices mean a lot to me. Only hers? Such a turn-off. Anyway. Ron was short-haired, Chris was pretty average truthfully, and Morena was as lovely as ever. Also, Clare Kramer was MC, but don't we all wish she wasn't. Moving on swiftly.

While the rest of us went and changed for the "Old West"-themed party, Guillaume queued to buy tickets for the photo shoots. Joey went for Nathan and I went for Alan. I hesitated between the two, but seeing Alan on stage set my mind. Alan it would be. Then it was party time! Sometimes I felt right at home (understand, as if I were in Canal Street), and sometimes like I was setting foot in a strange new world. The Star Trek song? O-kay, people. But it was fun, once we got what it was all about. The Time Warp is also a favourite of ours. I also love the Doctor Who song and dance. It was fun to do so many choreographed dances. I'd completely forgotten how to dance on MIB! Now my only regret is that I will probably very promptly forget all that. I'll try to remember the hand jive though, because it's good to know.

The next day started with a screening of Serenity – the pilot, not the film. I wish. Mwa-ha-ha on a big screen. Fun. Then Jo and I went and queued to get our pictures taken with Nathan and Alan. There was this girl wearing a replica of Kaylee's dress in Shindig, very impressive. We went in and queued in our different queues. We watched the end of the group shots being taken, and then while the guys took a break before going on. Mark and Nathan were having a very interesting conversation I'm sure, considering the miming Mark was going through to illustrate whatever they were talking about.

A lady in a wheelchair came to get a pic with Alan and Nathan. Now picture this: Nathan kneels down by her side, Alan comes to stand in his back. Then, right as the picture is taken, Alan pushes Nathan down to the floor, where he sprawls most gracelessly. He kneels back up, they take the picture, and then Nathan brings a hand to his shoulder, makes a painful face and goes all "he always does that..." Those two boys rock together (and on their own too). Then they started with the Nathan individual pics. I was the first of the Alan line, so Nathan was all mock-offended that he wouldn't be on the pic. Consequently, he had Alan distracted on the first attempted pic. So there we went again, smiling at the camera, when Nathan threw himself in front of us right at the opportune moment. And then went all innocent-like "I just wanted to come and sit here," sitting down on the chairs he had indeed got to. And then we finally had our picture. Woohoo! Thanks, Nathan. It gave me more time to be at Alan's side – the man just makes you want to hug him. He's comfortable. (Yes, he is. It's a very logical thing to say about someone, I'll have you know. You'd understand if you'd been there. He is comfortable.)

Then it was the Q&A session with Morena, Jewel and Chris. Morena and Jewel just keep snapping at each other. But in a playful, we love each other way. It's really quite funny to witness. And Chris happened to be a hell of a good surprise, plain funny and gorram interesting.
Among other things, we learned that due to the dress (that Morena had approved of) Jewel wore at her wedding, she could not wear any underwear or it would show. However, the wedding was on a beach and there was wind. Consequently, Morena spent the whole ceremony on her knees by Jewel, keeping the dress down. Then, during her maid-of-honour speech afterwards, she told all the attendees that Jewel did not have underwear.
Chris explained to us why there was tin foil on the whorehouse in Heart of Gold: Fox wanted things to look more futuristic. So what did they do? They grabbed tin foil and, ta-daa. Futuristic whorehouse.
Chris also remarked on how he had never heard either Sarah Michelle Gellar's or Charisma Carpenter's names linked by Joss to Wonder Woman. He said that the casting wouldn't happen before Joss was done with the script, since that would influence it. So no, nothing was decided yet. "Apart from me being in it," Morena added. "Apart from having cast the leading role," Chris concurred. (Joking aside, I think Morena could be a very valid choice of Wonder Woman.)
Also, Jewel is addicted to shoes.

Then was a Q&A with Summer and Ron. Summer is just so shy, it's almost worrying for someone whose job means that they have to be seen by so many many people. It was cute at first, but I have to say by the end of the next day I was just tired of it. It seemed too much. Ron was wonderful. Funny and damned handsome and that laugh of his... Someone actually remarked on it. He has a laugh to send shivers down your spine, so very charming. We need to have Book laugh more.
Talking about his role in – was it Teen Angel or something? – he had this to say: "Being God is, er... well, attractive." Which we can understand. He also shared light on Book's past: "Book used to be a ballet dancer."
Summer told us about learning martial arts for the film and being stuck to the ceiling for so long for that one scene. She explained how whenever she accidentally hurt one of the stunt guys, she expected to be told off but the choreographer was always blaming the stunt guy and not her, and how that was great.

Then was a screening of an episode of Space Cases. You don't know Space Cases? Boy, are you missing something... if only for the laughs. It's an 80s children's program where Jewel has rainbow hair and sonic powers. Fun. Fun, fun, fun. "All because of me." 'Nuff said.

Then was the long-awaited Q&A with Nathan, Alan and Mark. Mark himself remarked on it and it really shows: he might only have been in for a couple episodes, they welcomed him as part of the family, instantly. He knew Adam from previously but not the others, and he's just as much a part of their family as the lead cast members. It was simply lovely to see that. He also explained how he felt he had never said anything as stupid as that "I don't like the way you look down on me" line of Badger's, because given the height difference what else could Mal do? And, again, how he was doing all right as Badger until Adam kindly informed him that Joss had initially written the part for himself – and then he got stuck on the one line for ages. Cheers, Adam.
In the bearing-a-grudge department, in Nathan's words: "Michael Gowitz... You're dead to me." Michael Gowitz (sp?) is the one who put that picture of Nathan cross-eyed on the internet. And there was a reason why Adam Baldwin was dead to Nathan too, but we can't recall what it was exactly.
Nathan also tutored a guy in pronouncing "Tudyk," which he had trouble with. Imagine: "two, and then..." *insert appropriate hand gesture* That's Nathan for you. He also explained how he had hooked Alan to Halo. He used to play with just one friend of his, against a team of three, and still they won. Then he brought him Alan... and they dubbed him "The Equaliser." But to be fair, Alan's greatly improved since then and has now the highest scores of their team. Or something.
Nathan also told us how once he had mentioned he would like a "What Would Malcolm Reynolds Do?" bracelet, and a fan gave one to him that he still wore. WWMRD? (Apparently, the most frequent answer was: punch. Of the closed fist type.)
What else? According to Alan, Ron is the most handsome of the cast. And I have to agree. The last thing I expected was to come back from this weekend with a crush on Ron. But that's the kind of guy he is.
Oh, and yes. Joss is a god, Nathan said so. He's right. He created a universe (well, several actually). If that doesn't make him a god...

Then was Clare Kramer's Q&A, which very few people – not us – attended. Clare is just annoying. Imho. Then there was supposed to be a screening of Cleopatra 2525, but for some reason it did not happen. Oh well.

At seven was a screening of Dr Who. The Dalek (sp?) were back! Rosie filled us in on them and there we went, watching it. It was a pretty good episode, imho. I don't think Joey was hooked up too much, and I can get that. Doctor Who is something special alright and I don't expect everyone to be able to enjoy it.

Then we spent ages listening to and/or watching sci-fi credits/theme songs. It was pretty boring, I have to say, but something with the planned quiz went wrong. Then was the Fancy Dress parade, and oh boy. The winner was a Washosaurus, a girl with a Wash mask and clothes riding a T-rex. Impressive. Very. Second best was the statue of Jayne from Jaynestown, so funny. Among the best were also the crew of Serenity plus Mrs Reynolds, a kid dressed as River who went and handed out a messed up bible to Ron, the cutest toddler dressed as Luke Skywalker with Yoda on his back, some really hot Companions, Phantom of the Opera people, and lots of others.

Then it was party time again, except we really didn't dance all that much due to the fact that most of the guests actually stayed to hang with us. How wicked was that? We spent a bit of time with Jewel, talking about, well, dogs mostly. She's quite perfect for Joey, methinks. I'm simply not a pet person.
Then we went and talked with Mark some – he was on his own. I could just listen to him speak for ages, I love his accent. He is such a fan of the show. He truly is. And he has thought about Badger so much. He understands that like most so-called bad guys, Badger is, precisely, not a bad guy. He does his job and Mal is just a bleep on his radar, he sees maybe forty guys like Mal in a day. People simply don't get Badger. I really loved what Mark had to say about him. We also agreed that the theme for the next film should be: "Things would go well for Mal if he just did what Badger said." Oh yeah.
Then we went and talked with Alan. It started off well enough, discussing insults in British and American English (a very philosophical matter) and seeing him crave to get a lightsaber and go join the Jedi Chefs. But then the conversation got so serious! How awful. Seriously though, it was really interesting to discuss politics with him, he seems as much into it as Nathan. He feels very strongly about all this, and about where his country is going.
Then we went in and spotted Chris. Now, something I haven't mentioned about his Q&A: Chris started calling out people from so many different countries, but he left out France! So we started the conversation by pointing out how offended we were (not, but it's as good a way as any to get the conversation going). We clearly traumatised him much more than we had planned to, but oh well. He was absolutely lovely to talk to, our conversation lasted for so long and it was just so nice. We discussed dubbing, translation, release dates, production constraints and so many other things. For example, he always got samples of merchandising to ask him whether it was okay, and show them to Joss. And then when he told die-hard fans about them they were all "oh my god you have the trading card number *** tell me does it have a little star in the top right corner and can you ship it to Lithuania?" Also, soon to be a classic quote of his, after talking of marketing in different areas: "By the way, I do know that Scandinavia and Benelux aren't countries." And, mock-portraying someone who wouldn't know as much: "Beneluxian is such a nice language!" He also explained how the youth of the WB and UPN at first made it so they had no censors for S1 and S6, which was definitely a great help in doing what they wanted to do. Because then when the censors did come in they could just point out that they knew what they were doing and it had worked so far. He was appalled to hear that they had dubbed the songs of OMWF in French and he asked us what the dubbed version of Firefly was like – crap, said we, and mentioned "Jenny" – 'cause he was wondering whether they should try and cast new dubbers for Serenity. He also mentioned that Nathan spoke a bit of French, but Quebecois French, and imagined people's reactions if he dubbed himself: "Wait, the Captain is from Quebec?" Chris is a lovely guy.
When he had to go, we consequently moved on to Nathan, who is absolutely the sweetest in the way he has to enquire after the name of each new face he sees. How attentive to your fans can you get? It turns out that yes, he can speak quite good French, and his accent isn't so much Quebecois as that of an English speaker. But his pronunciation is awesome! He told us all about going to Quebec a couple of times in French. And the fangirls were nonplussed. Kudos to Nathan.

The next morning started with a screening of a Dead Like Me episode, the one where Jewel guest-stars (and, incidentally, so does Harold Perrineau). Since it's second season, it also starred Mandy Patinkin, which gave me even more of a happy. It's a fun show all right, but I can't say I'm the hugest fan though.

Then was the Q&A of Chris and Ron. Ron told us how technology-impaired he was. Once he went to Best Buy and asked where the typewriters were. They understandably laughed at him – sort of like what the whole audience was doing at that point, he added – and were unable to point him to anywhere where he might buy one. Later on, when someone asked them who they would put in their special hell, someone else in the audience yelled out "people who don't sell typewriters!" and Ron agreed with a (shiver-creating) laugh.
There was also talk of the upcoming action figures. Apparently, while Jayne's is quite good, Mal's looks like a scared rabbit. Don't ask. Also, someone told Chris that the key word to remember was posable. And when someone asked Chris who the third action figure was, he took a pause and pensively said, "What would Joss do?"
But the funniest part of this Q&A was definitely when Nathan came in to ask questions. He praised Ron about how he never made a mistake when shooting, he was always cool and composed, "you're smooth, you're liquid... yet you're solid," and concluded by asking,
"How much can you credit Nathan Fillion?" And then the same to Chris, who answered 99%.

Then came Nathan and Morena's Q&A. Other VIPs asking questions were Jewel and Chris. Jewel asked them if they remembered some of their lines and whether they could do a scene – they did the "everybody dies alone" bit. And Chris – well we're coming up blank on remembering the question, but he did end up praising the hell out of "Nathan Fillyon" (mispronounced).
Also, an attendee started asking: "Nathan, there's a question lots of people are wondering about..." which Nathan interrupted by, "Straight." Point of interest, Morena looked doubtful. We also learned that Nathan is a big Lost fan. Man of good taste that he is. He also imitated William Shatner quite well. And he can do a great Alan Tudyk impersonation. Oh! And he was asked "Kirk or Picard," and replied that it depended what for. Romulans, Klingons, a green lady (for which Kirk was the way to go). Whoever asked the question went for Klingons and Nathan answered Picard, then.
Also, Nathan and Morena had this thing going on where they complimented the other one on whatever, very earnestly, and then finished by, "If you like eating horseshit." Fun-ny.
They both agreed that producers did nothing at all. "Producers, I don't know what they do. They just sit there and go 'yeah... yeah... yeah... what are the numbers?!'"
Also, Nathan commented on that time when he sat down to rpg with some fans in a con and how he was much more visual than them and he couldn't really get into it. Plus, "you lost me with the maths."
Very nice Morena and Nathan interaction was when discussing the action figures, yet again. Nathan said that Jayne's was scratch-n-sniff. Morena then asked him which part he had scratched. To which he answered "the bum." And then, concerned that she should understand him: "that's English for butt."

Summer and Mark's Q&A. Mark still refused to say that he had coached Summer on her cockney accent, but instead that he had simply helped her some. He was very proud of the result, though, proud of her. Which was cute. Mark was very cute.
When someone asked Summer what she thought the plot of the second movie (let us all pray there will be a second movie) should be, Mark went, "I'm right here!" I can only agree. I want Badger in! He also said something about a River/Badger romance. Oh yeah.
Then someone asked them what kind of an evil overlord they would be. Mark pointed out that he already was an evil overlord. Summer said her first task would be to give everybody a swimming pool. Evil. (Apparently the catch is that chlorine dries your hair. So very evil.)

Space Cases again! An episode very telling in the subtle changes of the relationship between Catalina (Jewel's character – sp?) and the black kid she supposedly had UST with. Oh yeah.

Straight after that was Alan and Jewel's Q&A. The best question was undoubtedly this one: "Jewel, you were part of an on-screen romance that's got everyone holding their breaths. We just have to know. Is anything ever gonna happen between Catalina and X?" (Yeah, I can't remember the black kid's name. So sue me.)
I was ever so proud and fangirly with Alan too, when he was asked about A Knight's Tale and he seemed to remember it so fondly (and their bonding before the film). He explained how Heath absolutely hated the fact that the poster was only about him, no one hated it more than him. There had been another poster planned, modelled after the Starwars poster, with Adhemar in place of Darth Vader – and yes, people! He actually remembered the name Adhemar. He also said that by now he had lost his English accent but he still did the "it's called a lance" line. Woohoo! I love that line.

Then was a Q&A with absolutely all the guests, and how lovely that was. Even though it took forever to answer any one question. Apart maybe from "Why do you pick on Jewel so much?" "Yeah, why do you?" asked Jewel of Nathan, who simply answered, "Because it's easy."
Summer also came out with her own accusation: "Nathan's a big bully." Oh yeah. He's the one who started the "blame Summer" game where whatever went wrong would be Summer's fault. But she also said that his picking on her like that made her feel special, and like she belonged.
Alan had a very funny anecdote about his first meeting the captain. He got to the studio and started talking with him, thinking "they completely screwed up the casting on that one, it's gonna suck so much." Then he actually asked the guy "so you're the captain, huh?" And the answer was "no, I'm the doctor." You can then imagine Alan's relief when he met Nathan. Morena also kept thinking that Adam was Mal and Nathan Jayne, up until they started shooting. And Alan's reaction to Gina was "That's my wife! Oh god I'm gonna have to step up."
William Shatner came back in the conversation when an attendee asked the other guests if they could imitate him, which had Ron mock-ask "Who is Bill Shatner?" and Alan report a conversation they had had once, where Shatner kept going on about the hell that is the motorway and all Alan could think was "oh god it's William Shatner." Morena and Summer sadly refused to imitate him.
Chris also did an awesome job in... mentioning France! (And sort of us. When I say we traumatised him...) Kudos to him.
When asked about how they got feedback on what the fans thought, most replied from the Internet. Then Ron got the mike, started "When I was on the internet..." then stopped. And let the audience holler like crazy.
We also learned that Nathan had trained to be a schoolteacher! And they all made a very good point for anyone who wanted to work in TV or the cinema: if you're scared, go for it. And if you're not, something is very wrong.

As for getting our stuff signed – the only one who spontaneously put the apostrophe to Fan' was Summer. Alan only did it when I asked him to (and he was confused about what an apostrophe was). With the others, I just didn't bother. Nathan had trouble understanding us when we told him – in French – "we wanna have babies. How do you feel about sperm donation?" We eventually got our point across, to which he cutely replied "Non, là j'en ai pas avec moi." (No, I don't have any with me here.) So we'll have to get back to him at a later date (or ask Chris, I could do with Chris). When we got to Chris, we thanked him for mentioning France and for coming. I love Chris! Anyway. A girl gave Jewel a picture of Nathan and went "go on, let it out" and she scribbled all over it. Heh. Joey told Ron she was disappointed he hadn't come out to dance at the party the previous night and I added I wanted to see him dance on Saturday Night Fever. He laughed. I got shivery. And does anyone know what he wrote on his autograph? He wrote the same thing for all of us, but we can't figure it out. Also, Summer wrote me a "No power in the verse..." on her picture, which was lovely.

We were sitting on the floor for the closing ceremony, which was admittedly not very comfortable, but oh well. It was lovely. Sean thanked each of the guys one after the other and they got up and said a few words. Jewel came up with, "I'd just like to say that Morena isn't wearing any underwear." And then Morena started hers by "I am so wearing underwear." (Did I mention her loverboy is rather yummy in a tall, dark 'n handsome "look at those dark eyes of his" way? I wouldn't mind being the meat of that sandwich either.)
When Alan was cheered by the crowd, the tumult eventually started dying down, at which point Nathan (in Alan's back) let out a hell of a mighty roar. Alan made an annoyed face and rolled his eyes, at which point Nathan pretended it was Ron doing it. Alan half turned to them and chided him, "Ron..."
When Sean introduced, last but not least, Nathan, he went on for ages without naming him, praising him as a leading man in more than one way, etc. And before he could name him, Alan stood up as if he'd been talking of him all the time, then looked all sad and disappointed that it was not him. Then Nathan did his own little speech: "Chris, Mark, Ron, Alan... I told you so. Summer, Morena... it was great working with you. Jewel..." Then he turned back to the audience and made to go on without a word for her. Obviously, we started booing him. At which point he looked all disapproving and went, "Hey! She's just a little girl!" And he turned to Jewel and made a sympathetic face and went, "They don't mean that. Not a fucking word." Heh. I heart Nathan.
Also, at one point Sean was saying how over the course of the weekend he had not heard one complaint from any of the guests, despite the hard work and long hours, and he had not even seen any form of non-verbal complaint. At which point Nathan, in his back, gave him the finger. Now, you have to know that Nathan and Jewel have a finger-giving history, which started on the wrap reel with a Caleb doll. So Sean went, "I could respond to that, but I'm just gonna ask Jewel to do it for me." So Jewel stood up and gave Nathan both fingers. Mwa-ha-ha. Do not mess with the Jewel.

Also, I forgot to mention it but they did show us the trailer. Three times. For the last two, we were filmed by Universal people to put on the bonuses of the eventual Serenity DVD. What I love most about that trailer? Of course, there are some lovely lines ("Let's be bad guys." / "Define interesting." "Oh god oh god we're all gonna die?" / "She's a might unpredictable. Mood swings of sorts." / "It's worse than you think." "It usually is." / "I don't murder children." "I do.") and brilliant scenes (River going all martial artist or sticking to the ceiling, for instance). But what I loved most was the acknowledgement of the fans. It's not often that we are given such recognition and it feels gorram good, let me tell ya. It's gonna be so weird when the film is a hit (not if, but when), because then so many people are gonna be into it. For the moment it's just us. Soon enough, the whole world will know about the brilliance of the Fireflyverse and all of those who took part in it. I'm just thankful they acknowledged the fans-from-before.

And finally, the last party. Much dancing again. Fun fun fun. We should have geek clubs where we can have parties like that. Yuh-uh. I really wish I could afford going to Serenity 2, but I really don't know whether that's gonna be possible. What is sure is that I will treasure the memories of this weekend for a long, long time.

And that I can't bloody wait to see Serenity.

So, thanks to the guests, and the organisers, and all the other browncoats who made this weekend what it was. My first con was a gui of a good experience.

Comments

[anna-tarawiel.livejournal.com]

aawww ! I don't watch Firefly (because I missed the pilot on serieclub) but I loved reading your "summary". It seems you had a wonderful weekend.

Hugs to you and Joey !!

[the-swordman.livejournal.com]

I don't watch Firefly
You're missing something then :)
Ask Jo or Fan', they both got the DVDs.

It is definitely worth watching.

And we had a wonderful week end, indeed :)

[twixou.livejournal.com]

Just one thing : I. Am. So. Jealous. ;)

And one more : pictures please ! :p

[the-swordman.livejournal.com]

I'll try to upload mines at some point next week after my exams.

[twixou.livejournal.com]

Thxxxxx ! :)

(btw, I need your email adress for the music thing :p)

[the-swordman.livejournal.com]

Internet seems to be okay for now. Don't know how long it'll last but for the moment you can send it to the marcus_cole2003@yahoo.fr

Merci d'avance :)

[the-swordman.livejournal.com]

Just to let you know, Fan' can update her LJ but can't answer comments. She only got Internet at School and can't access LJ.

I personally think the rabbit thing was a private joke from a previous con Nathan attended. I actually felt sorry for the girl rather than annoyed :)

[greenie-breizh.livejournal.com]

Well, Fan' and I (this is Joey from the con :) tried to remember everything we could about the con, put the details together and got to this... little details we forgot to write down still pop up sometimes, but you can't edit forever... ;)

Btw, I didn't get the rabbit thing either... and clearly Nathan didn't either. ;)

[fan-elune.livejournal.com]

Hey Tessa! I'm here for a quickie, but I still won't be able to answer comments for two more weeks.

About the rabbit thing - wasn't it somehow related to the action figure? 'Cause at one point someone said that Mal's looked like a scared rabbit - and I think the crazy girl misunderstood. But yeah... poor girl.