(no subject)

[fan_elune]

Top Ten Signs You're Reading A Fanfic By Fan':

10. Allusions to this and that. Can be to other fictions, series, whatever, can also be private jokes between me and friends, or just me and me. I like to amuse myself, clearly.

9. Eyeseyeseyes. And gazes, and looks, and stares. I will fixate on people's eyes and the way they look at other people.

8. When I don't fixate on eyes, I will likely fixate on hands. Because hands will tell you what eyes don't.

7. Very likely no NC-17-worthy smut, R will be the best you'll get. Often I'll actually skip over the smut, actually. And if you do find smut? There will be a point. It won't just be for the hotness.

6. It might take me pages and pages and pages to get two characters together, because I hate dismissing canon. But I'll take my time and get them together eventually, no matter how not-canon (or slash or het) they are. I'll just do it in my own time.

5. You'll get a very oral-like narration. Tolkien's style is the antithesis of mine. I'll stay close to the character, and view everything through his or her eyes. Stream of consciousness.

4. While the smut has to be pointy for me to write it, interaction between two characters can be written just for the sake of it.

3. OMG ACTION IT BURNSSS USSSS. I suck at action scenes. Writing them is like geeting teeth pulled out. It shows.

2. Plot? I need a plot? You mean bringing characters together for the fun of seeing them interact isn't enough? Fine, I'll find you a plot, but don't come whining to me if it's weak. I warned you. (I could never throw the first stone at RTD. Or any stone at all, actually.)

1. Bittersweet is the word. And angst, there's bound to be angst, unless I was specifically asked for fluff, and even then I tend to manage to sneak in a hint of angst here or there. It doesn't mean the ending is bound to be sad, but... bittersweet is the word. And I believe that happy endings are just temporary. It's what happens after the happy that's interesting.


And now, this meme - please guys, do it! Yes, I'm begging, because I'd love to see what you all come up with, even those of you who don't usually write fanfiction. (Especially those of you not versed in writing much?) Pretty please with the character of your choice on top? I'm listing a whole bunch of characters (as in, thirty) so you can really take your pick. No excuses, guys! There's bound to be one that appeals to you.

Leave a list of fictional characters in your journal that you would love to get a message from. It is your friend-list's mission, should they choose to accept it, to write you an in-character "letter" from a character on that list. Then they post their own list in their journal and the process continues!

1. Keith Mars (Veronica Mars)
2. Jonesy (Carnivàle)
3. Mal (Firefly)
4. River (Firefly)
5. Sark (Alias)
6. Jack Bristow (Alias)
7. Kira (ST:DS9)
8. Methos (Highlander)
9. Snape (Harry Potter)
10. Fred and George Weasley (Harry Potter)
11. Boromir (Lord of the Rings)
12. Chaucer (A Knight's Tale)
13. Germaine (A Knight's Tale)
14. Jim Profit (Profit)
15. CJ Cregg (The West Wing)
16. Analucia (Lost)
17. Desmond (Lost)
18. Faith (Buffy)
19. Nuwanda (Dead Poets' Society)
20. Stephen Maturin (Master and Commander)
21. Lindsey McDonald (Angel)
22. Michael Pinocchio (Harsh Realm)
23. Crowley or Aziraphale, I'm not picky (Good Omens)
24. The devil (Brimstone)
25. Kirill (The Bourne Supremacy)
26. Scud (DEBs)
27. Scott Summers, aka Cyclops (X-Men)
28. Cal McCaffrey or Dan Foster (State of Play)
29. Stuart Allan Jones or Vince Tyler (Queer as Folk UK)
30. Anybody from Boy Meets Boy

And I'm adding three characters I can't believe I forgot to start with what is wrong with me! Nine, Ten, and Jack. *facepalm*

I should be ranting about Lost (Eko! Jack! Sawyer!), The L-Word (OMG ALAN CUMMING! And Keram Malicki-Sanchez!) and Veronica Mars, instead I let myself get distracted by memes. I'm bad. Very.

Comments

[houses7177.livejournal.com]

Hey 'Fan! It's George [and Fred]! You know, the handsome red-heads? We had an absolutely smashing time last night at The Simmering Sweetmeats. Hope you don't mind the owl, but you didn't give us your fellytone numbers, or whatever they're called. Maybe you'd like to join us tonight? Say, six? [or seven thirty because unlike some people, I have work to do] Ignore Fred. So, can you come? We promise a round or three on us.

George [and Fred, I mean, really!]

[heikki-cheren.livejournal.com]

*looks at the post, yawns and shrugs*
Am I likely to find some beer in your frige?
*heads for the kitchen without waiting for an answer*

M. aka A.P. aka B.A. aka....

[shadesofbrixton.livejournal.com]

Absolutely not. I refuse. Utterly. I cannot imagine a more disgusting waste of time. It's both frivolous and insulting, and I'll thank you not to ask for something along those lines again. Do you have any idea what sort of special treatment you ask for? …no, you wouldn't, would you. Thinking only of yourself, you selfish little child, grabbing at favor like an infant toward a shiny bauble. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, if you even have the capacity left for such an ability. I, frankly, would not be surprised in the slightest to find that you showed such disregard to all aspects of your life. If you expect me – honestly, me - to take time out of my schedule to pander to your whims, simply because you're bored? Twenty points from Slytherin, and let the whole House know it was your fault. Perhaps the next time you call on me to perform as your trained monkey, you'll think before you speak.

[catherinecookmn.livejournal.com]

11. The characterization will be superb.

12. Characters from different fictional universes will be brought together, and their interactions will MAKE SENSE. (Edward. Narcissa. Need I say more?)

[shadesofbrixton.livejournal.com]

Is it – how do you know it's working – is this thing on? Hello? He – oh look, it's writing everything I say! Terribly clever, my dear. Have to share that one with the…well, nevermind.

RRRRHHGGHkkkGhkn.

Oh, Crowley, that's vile, it just wrote out what it sounds like when I clear my throat. And then it's just gone and written that. And that. And th – yes, fine! No need to get violent about it, goodness. Keep your hands to yourself.

No, the Jaffa cakes are in the other cupboard.



No, the one next to that one.

Splendid. Right.


Hello!

Oh, that was a bit over the top, wasn't it. A bit too chipp – YES, alright, Crowley, I'm writing it, I'm writing it.

He – no. To Whom It May Concern.

It has come to my attention (is that too formal? No, keep on.) that sometime in the last hundred years, a rather rare and hard-to-come-by (Yes, I know that's redundant. Am I the one writing this, or are you? …oh, don't make that face.) Book has been accidentally misplaced. It's been very hard to find this Book, you see, and Someone is looking for it quite a lot, and would like to see it returned as soon as possible, and in excellent care.

Our last records (that's lying, I don't like that – oh, bugger it, it just wrote that as well – and that as well. And that. Stop laughing, Crowley!)

According to the former owner, it may have been accidentally – very accidentally – buried beneath your floorboards. It's quite possible that, were you to prize them up, oh you've gotten biscuit crumbs all over the paper. And now it's gone and written th – agh! Make it stop.


Hrmf.

If you find the book, you will be handsomely rewarded. Crowley, don't snort, it's perfectly true.

Yours respectfully,

A. Ziraphale

[foxxcub.livejournal.com]

Hey there, Fan. Right fine journal ya got here, little on the dark side, but that's never been a problem for me. Thought I'd drop by and say howdy. So...howdy.

Yeah. Think I'll be going now.

Mal

[poisontaster]

My dear Elune,

Darling, I was just thrilled to get your latest missive. Unfortunately, I still have no idea what Bristow and Co. intend to do with me now that I've despoiled their latest wide-eyed virgin. In any case, it's deadly dull here, quite literally. Scientists are such shrinking violets about simple interrogation techniques. In any case, must run. Keep warm, since I'm not there to do it for you!

Julian.

[stampinground.livejournal.com]

Whhhhhhhhhe I'm naked... Woops wrong audience !
Eh Fan', just wanted to say thanks for the greaaat night at the pub yesterday ! Mikhael told me to say hello to Joey too... so hello Joey !! Anyway, hope we will be able to do it again !!

See ya
Harley

[the-grynne.livejournal.com]

Ms. Elune,

Remember me? Stuart? Or, as you so memorably put it, the "metrosexual with an eye for empty bling, a self-proclaimed psychology degree and a dangerous will to seduce and manipulate."

Well, you have been a busy little bug haven't you, missy? A right talented little propaganda artist. Pity you never showed any hints of such promise when you were actually still in our employ.

How much money did the magazine pay you to write those snappy, witty diatribes targeting our business? Oh, don't worry, I certainly don't take it personally. I only want an idea so that I can counter-offer with a higher number.

You would be a fool not to accept, so put that newly sharpened brain of yours to good use.

Stuart Jones
Partner

[greenie-breizh.livejournal.com]

Heya,

'sup on your part of the globe? Lucy and I are off to New Zealand tomorrow - turns out a life of crime sounded pretty good to Lucy again after she dumped her girlfriend, and you know me - was more than happy to follow. 'Cuz let's face it, being honest just doesn't pay. And I really can't keep passing on all those awesome clothes (striped shirts own me, seriously).

So anyway. Australia should be toast in a couple of days, just to give you the heads up. An attitude thing I think Lucy said. I've just stopped asking. After that we might need to head back to Reyk - Antartica or whatever to chill out a bit. 'll keep you updated.

Peace,
-Scud

[greenie-breizh.livejournal.com]

All right. I know I should actually give you a call, but things have been crazy around here - I don't even know why Canadian elections has been keeping us busy, honestly. You'd think we could leave our neighbors in peace when they're trying to elect someone? And believe me, you do not want to ask Toby about the FBI right now - which of course I've been asked to do at least ten times in the last couple of days. I'm also delighted to report that the Press Corps has been asking me non-stop about that date Dan and I went on last Friday - it almost makes me wish Josh had been handling the Press Room (almost, because I would regret seeing the White House crumble to the floor just because he hates being incapable of answering a question - and as much as I love Josh, he does go for snide remarks way too often to be working in that Press Room - did I ever tell you about the time where I had root canal).

Point? Been busy. Sorry. Are you still on for that visit in March though? We'll be getting worried about spring floods, you'll see - amazing time of the year. And maybe we finally have stopped hearing about the Evil Gay Cowboy Movie by then.

I've got to run. Josh is making those snide remarks about using LJ.

Take care,
C.J.

[twixou.livejournal.com]

Can I add a number 11 on your list? You know you're reading a fanfic by Fan' when you wait, and wait, and wait a bit more to get the next chapter, and you complain a lot because you love that fic and you desperately need this damn chapter in order to go on with your life and stop obsessing over this fic!

*ahem* well, you know. :p

;)

[khylarenelf.livejournal.com]

Imagine my wicked, witty, wanting smile
as I say these wanton words to you:
"She is beauty, like the night"
and I'm right, for your beauty, like your name, is like the moon.

Not bad for a Welton man, eh?

XOXO

Nuwanda

[heikki-cheren.livejournal.com]

Hmmm.... I knew something felt wrong. But when I reread the text yesterday before posting, I saw "get a message from" so I thought I had misread or whatever.
Just found out the next line mentionned "letter".
Sorry. :-/

[(Anonymous)]

Sigh... I managed about a sentence and a half of Jack-like speak before I dried up. Maybe I'll try again in the morning!

Writer's block is evil.

*passing hug*

[randomling]

Now then. Correspondence. Let's see.

Letter from... No, leave that one to Rose. Couple of data-cubes from the 32nd century, nothing to be done about those. Distress calls, all dealt with. And Rose is asleep. Okay.

Ah, yeah. Fan. From Paris, 21st century, right - I remember you. Hello!

Good to get your letter. Funny how things always seem to filter down somehow, it was UNIT passed this on in the end. They need to cut down on the paperwork, though. Not much use to you if I get it in sixty years' time, is it?

Anyway, to answer your question: I'm not sure it's such a good idea to write about what you saw and put it on the internet. No, not even if you turn it into a story. First off, there are a fair few people out there who take the phrase "cleaning up" too seriously, and second, you don't want thrillseekers piling up. Anyone who goes looking for danger... well, they tend to get more than they bargained for, and you don't want to get caught up in that sort of trouble again. Do you?

If you want to talk about it, there's people who'll believe you. Honest. And they're not all soldiers - you're right, you probably wouldn't get a lot of moral support out of UNIT anyway. Look up a bloke called Mickey Smith in London. Or maybe Sarah Jane Smith (no relation). They'll set you straight.

Take care of yourself, Fan. You'll be okay. Remember: Tout casse, tout lasse, tout passe.

Yours ever,

The Doctor