fan_elune: (billy sexy)
[personal profile] fan_elune
Top Ten Signs You're Reading A Fanfic By Fan':

10. Allusions to this and that. Can be to other fictions, series, whatever, can also be private jokes between me and friends, or just me and me. I like to amuse myself, clearly.

9. Eyeseyeseyes. And gazes, and looks, and stares. I will fixate on people's eyes and the way they look at other people.

8. When I don't fixate on eyes, I will likely fixate on hands. Because hands will tell you what eyes don't.

7. Very likely no NC-17-worthy smut, R will be the best you'll get. Often I'll actually skip over the smut, actually. And if you do find smut? There will be a point. It won't just be for the hotness.

6. It might take me pages and pages and pages to get two characters together, because I hate dismissing canon. But I'll take my time and get them together eventually, no matter how not-canon (or slash or het) they are. I'll just do it in my own time.

5. You'll get a very oral-like narration. Tolkien's style is the antithesis of mine. I'll stay close to the character, and view everything through his or her eyes. Stream of consciousness.

4. While the smut has to be pointy for me to write it, interaction between two characters can be written just for the sake of it.

3. OMG ACTION IT BURNSSS USSSS. I suck at action scenes. Writing them is like geeting teeth pulled out. It shows.

2. Plot? I need a plot? You mean bringing characters together for the fun of seeing them interact isn't enough? Fine, I'll find you a plot, but don't come whining to me if it's weak. I warned you. (I could never throw the first stone at RTD. Or any stone at all, actually.)

1. Bittersweet is the word. And angst, there's bound to be angst, unless I was specifically asked for fluff, and even then I tend to manage to sneak in a hint of angst here or there. It doesn't mean the ending is bound to be sad, but... bittersweet is the word. And I believe that happy endings are just temporary. It's what happens after the happy that's interesting.


And now, this meme - please guys, do it! Yes, I'm begging, because I'd love to see what you all come up with, even those of you who don't usually write fanfiction. (Especially those of you not versed in writing much?) Pretty please with the character of your choice on top? I'm listing a whole bunch of characters (as in, thirty) so you can really take your pick. No excuses, guys! There's bound to be one that appeals to you.

Leave a list of fictional characters in your journal that you would love to get a message from. It is your friend-list's mission, should they choose to accept it, to write you an in-character "letter" from a character on that list. Then they post their own list in their journal and the process continues!

1. Keith Mars (Veronica Mars)
2. Jonesy (Carnivàle)
3. Mal (Firefly)
4. River (Firefly)
5. Sark (Alias)
6. Jack Bristow (Alias)
7. Kira (ST:DS9)
8. Methos (Highlander)
9. Snape (Harry Potter)
10. Fred and George Weasley (Harry Potter)
11. Boromir (Lord of the Rings)
12. Chaucer (A Knight's Tale)
13. Germaine (A Knight's Tale)
14. Jim Profit (Profit)
15. CJ Cregg (The West Wing)
16. Analucia (Lost)
17. Desmond (Lost)
18. Faith (Buffy)
19. Nuwanda (Dead Poets' Society)
20. Stephen Maturin (Master and Commander)
21. Lindsey McDonald (Angel)
22. Michael Pinocchio (Harsh Realm)
23. Crowley or Aziraphale, I'm not picky (Good Omens)
24. The devil (Brimstone)
25. Kirill (The Bourne Supremacy)
26. Scud (DEBs)
27. Scott Summers, aka Cyclops (X-Men)
28. Cal McCaffrey or Dan Foster (State of Play)
29. Stuart Allan Jones or Vince Tyler (Queer as Folk UK)
30. Anybody from Boy Meets Boy

And I'm adding three characters I can't believe I forgot to start with what is wrong with me! Nine, Ten, and Jack. *facepalm*

I should be ranting about Lost (Eko! Jack! Sawyer!), The L-Word (OMG ALAN CUMMING! And Keram Malicki-Sanchez!) and Veronica Mars, instead I let myself get distracted by memes. I'm bad. Very.

Date: 2006-01-24 08:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] houses7177.livejournal.com
Hey 'Fan! It's George [and Fred]! You know, the handsome red-heads? We had an absolutely smashing time last night at The Simmering Sweetmeats. Hope you don't mind the owl, but you didn't give us your fellytone numbers, or whatever they're called. Maybe you'd like to join us tonight? Say, six? [or seven thirty because unlike some people, I have work to do] Ignore Fred. So, can you come? We promise a round or three on us.

George [and Fred, I mean, really!]

Date: 2006-01-24 08:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Hey George! And Fred. I was a bit surprised at the owl, but it settled down after I gave it something to eat. I hope it'll get back to you two without a problem, and it's called a telephone. The promise of three (or five?) rounds on you? I will definitely be there. At six, even. (Honestly, Fred, work?)

See you tonight!
Fan'

---
....heeee!! Thank you! Big huge idiotic grin on my face. Joey must think I'm bonkers. Which, she'd be totally right. *loves the twins like crazy*

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Date: 2006-01-24 09:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heikki-cheren.livejournal.com
*looks at the post, yawns and shrugs*
Am I likely to find some beer in your frige?
*heads for the kitchen without waiting for an answer*

M. aka A.P. aka B.A. aka....

Date: 2006-01-24 09:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Actually... *finishes once you're already peering into the fridge* the only thing we have left is a can of Dr. Pepper. Which, don't even think about touching it.

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Date: 2006-01-24 09:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shadesofbrixton.livejournal.com
Absolutely not. I refuse. Utterly. I cannot imagine a more disgusting waste of time. It's both frivolous and insulting, and I'll thank you not to ask for something along those lines again. Do you have any idea what sort of special treatment you ask for? …no, you wouldn't, would you. Thinking only of yourself, you selfish little child, grabbing at favor like an infant toward a shiny bauble. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, if you even have the capacity left for such an ability. I, frankly, would not be surprised in the slightest to find that you showed such disregard to all aspects of your life. If you expect me – honestly, me - to take time out of my schedule to pander to your whims, simply because you're bored? Twenty points from Slytherin, and let the whole House know it was your fault. Perhaps the next time you call on me to perform as your trained monkey, you'll think before you speak.

Date: 2006-01-24 09:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
I don't, actually, have the capacity left for such an ability, professor. I know no shame, and have not for a long while now. ...and I have an owl for you - the poor bird must've got lost - from a certain outlaw? Not that I read it when I saw who it was addressed to, I wouldn't dare, not when it enclosed such intimate matters and personal details. Cookies, really? And, well, I didn't know you had it in you. Now about those twenty points...

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From: [identity profile] shadesofbrixton.livejournal.com - Date: 2006-01-24 09:25 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2006-01-24 09:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] catherinecookmn.livejournal.com
11. The characterization will be superb.

12. Characters from different fictional universes will be brought together, and their interactions will MAKE SENSE. (Edward. Narcissa. Need I say more?)

Date: 2006-01-24 09:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
*blushes* Thank you. A lot. Edward and Narcissa make so much sense in my head, I'm so happy I managed to make it make sense for other people. They were just meant to be written about.

Date: 2006-01-24 09:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shadesofbrixton.livejournal.com
Is it – how do you know it's working – is this thing on? Hello? He – oh look, it's writing everything I say! Terribly clever, my dear. Have to share that one with the…well, nevermind.

RRRRHHGGHkkkGhkn.

Oh, Crowley, that's vile, it just wrote out what it sounds like when I clear my throat. And then it's just gone and written that. And that. And th – yes, fine! No need to get violent about it, goodness. Keep your hands to yourself.

No, the Jaffa cakes are in the other cupboard.



No, the one next to that one.

Splendid. Right.


Hello!

Oh, that was a bit over the top, wasn't it. A bit too chipp – YES, alright, Crowley, I'm writing it, I'm writing it.

He – no. To Whom It May Concern.

It has come to my attention (is that too formal? No, keep on.) that sometime in the last hundred years, a rather rare and hard-to-come-by (Yes, I know that's redundant. Am I the one writing this, or are you? …oh, don't make that face.) Book has been accidentally misplaced. It's been very hard to find this Book, you see, and Someone is looking for it quite a lot, and would like to see it returned as soon as possible, and in excellent care.

Our last records (that's lying, I don't like that – oh, bugger it, it just wrote that as well – and that as well. And that. Stop laughing, Crowley!)

According to the former owner, it may have been accidentally – very accidentally – buried beneath your floorboards. It's quite possible that, were you to prize them up, oh you've gotten biscuit crumbs all over the paper. And now it's gone and written th – agh! Make it stop.


Hrmf.

If you find the book, you will be handsomely rewarded. Crowley, don't snort, it's perfectly true.

Yours respectfully,

A. Ziraphale

Date: 2006-01-24 09:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Mr. Ziraphale, (and Crowley,)

I will unfortunately be unable to look for this Book of yours under my floorboards, due to the fact that I have just died of laughter. (And it is all your fault.)

That said, there was no fiery chasm opening beneath my feet, or white light calling me up, so it seems like I'm stuck in this realm for the time being. (Not that I mind, heaven sounds awfully boring and hell - well, it's hell.) If you're ready to wait a few days, I'll do my best to pull off a Patrick-Swayze asap. I'm hoping to master pushing a mug around by the end of tomorrow, lifting floorboards should be feasible by next week.

Yours ectoplasmically,
Fan'

Date: 2006-01-24 10:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foxxcub.livejournal.com
Hey there, Fan. Right fine journal ya got here, little on the dark side, but that's never been a problem for me. Thought I'd drop by and say howdy. So...howdy.

Yeah. Think I'll be going now.

Mal

Date: 2006-01-24 10:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
*only just refrains from squeeing* *LOUDLY*

*instead, just nods at him* Cap'n.



Thank you, hon! Spot-on. Hee! Mal! *squishes* (I'm such a fangirl, honestly.)

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Date: 2006-01-24 12:42 pm (UTC)
poisontaster: character Wen Qing from The Untamed (Peeking)
From: [personal profile] poisontaster
My dear Elune,

Darling, I was just thrilled to get your latest missive. Unfortunately, I still have no idea what Bristow and Co. intend to do with me now that I've despoiled their latest wide-eyed virgin. In any case, it's deadly dull here, quite literally. Scientists are such shrinking violets about simple interrogation techniques. In any case, must run. Keep warm, since I'm not there to do it for you!

Julian.

Date: 2006-01-24 02:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Julian darling,

I suppose I will have to find ways to pass the time, and keep me warm, while you're off attempting not to die of boredom. Or any other cause, no matter how less probable, I suppose. Send Irina my regards, if your paths cross.

Oh, and do bring me something pretty - other than yourself, that is - when you next visit. You'll have to make me forgive your long absence.

Elune

Date: 2006-01-24 12:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stampinground.livejournal.com
Whhhhhhhhhe I'm naked... Woops wrong audience !
Eh Fan', just wanted to say thanks for the greaaat night at the pub yesterday ! Mikhael told me to say hello to Joey too... so hello Joey !! Anyway, hope we will be able to do it again !!

See ya
Harley

Date: 2006-01-24 02:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Not at all the wrong audience, Harls, you know I always love to catch you naked. ...much as I don't so much enjoy the part where Mikhail tries to glare actual real razor-sharp daggers at me. I think I should try and explain him the whole "I'm only looking" deal.
Anyway! You're welcome, honey, we had the best time as well. I'm not surprised Joey and Mik get on that well. We definitely should do it again. You and me with the dancing, the two of them with the lots and lots of talking. Maybe we could invite Gio and Tyb to join us next time?

Kisses!
Fan'
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Date: 2006-01-24 02:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Oh, do drop by big sis. I wanna meet the man that's gotten you all lovey-dovey, find out if he really is prettier than you. He's gotta be something special alright for you to keep him around.
I'm still wanting, taking and having, taking after you I guess.
I miss ya.

-- Sis.
(deleted comment)

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From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com - Date: 2006-01-25 02:35 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2006-01-24 02:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] the-grynne.livejournal.com
Ms. Elune,

Remember me? Stuart? Or, as you so memorably put it, the "metrosexual with an eye for empty bling, a self-proclaimed psychology degree and a dangerous will to seduce and manipulate."

Well, you have been a busy little bug haven't you, missy? A right talented little propaganda artist. Pity you never showed any hints of such promise when you were actually still in our employ.

How much money did the magazine pay you to write those snappy, witty diatribes targeting our business? Oh, don't worry, I certainly don't take it personally. I only want an idea so that I can counter-offer with a higher number.

You would be a fool not to accept, so put that newly sharpened brain of yours to good use.

Stuart Jones
Partner

Date: 2006-01-24 02:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Mr. Jones,

How could I forget you. And did I say that, truly? I must have meant "a neurotic need to seduce and manipulate." Slip of the tongue, I'm terribly sorry. And I'm surprised that I failed to mention the underlying misogyny. What on earth was I thinking that day? Not much, you'll tell me, I know. Newly sharpened brain, yaddi yaddi yadda.

I'd be extremely glad to make an appointment with you to discuss your offer. Although it's only fair to let you know that you're not the only one trying to buy me up these days. It seems that my modest little column really did draw attention to itself.

I'm looking forward to meeting you in person again. I'm sure it will be most... entertaining.

Fan Elune
Talented Little Propaganda Artist

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Date: 2006-01-24 02:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greenie-breizh.livejournal.com
Heya,

'sup on your part of the globe? Lucy and I are off to New Zealand tomorrow - turns out a life of crime sounded pretty good to Lucy again after she dumped her girlfriend, and you know me - was more than happy to follow. 'Cuz let's face it, being honest just doesn't pay. And I really can't keep passing on all those awesome clothes (striped shirts own me, seriously).

So anyway. Australia should be toast in a couple of days, just to give you the heads up. An attitude thing I think Lucy said. I've just stopped asking. After that we might need to head back to Reyk - Antartica or whatever to chill out a bit. 'll keep you updated.

Peace,
-Scud

Date: 2006-01-24 02:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greenie-breizh.livejournal.com
PS : I'm sooooo sorry I haven't been in touch.

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Date: 2006-01-24 03:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] greenie-breizh.livejournal.com
All right. I know I should actually give you a call, but things have been crazy around here - I don't even know why Canadian elections has been keeping us busy, honestly. You'd think we could leave our neighbors in peace when they're trying to elect someone? And believe me, you do not want to ask Toby about the FBI right now - which of course I've been asked to do at least ten times in the last couple of days. I'm also delighted to report that the Press Corps has been asking me non-stop about that date Dan and I went on last Friday - it almost makes me wish Josh had been handling the Press Room (almost, because I would regret seeing the White House crumble to the floor just because he hates being incapable of answering a question - and as much as I love Josh, he does go for snide remarks way too often to be working in that Press Room - did I ever tell you about the time where I had root canal).

Point? Been busy. Sorry. Are you still on for that visit in March though? We'll be getting worried about spring floods, you'll see - amazing time of the year. And maybe we finally have stopped hearing about the Evil Gay Cowboy Movie by then.

I've got to run. Josh is making those snide remarks about using LJ.

Take care,
C.J.

Date: 2006-01-24 04:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Wait a second here - Dan and you went on a date and you're not telling me anymore than you're telling the Press Corps? Claudia Jean Cregg, I thought we were friends. I am still coming in March, and I will make sure to extract every little detail out of you. In a painfully embarrassing way, since you won't give them willingly.

I'll be off plotting your demise, Miss Cregg.

Fan'

PS: pinch Josh's cute little tushie for me, will you? ...right, okay, I know, you want me to stop asking you to do that. Can you do Toby's then? That man needs love.

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Date: 2006-01-24 03:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] twixou.livejournal.com
Can I add a number 11 on your list? You know you're reading a fanfic by Fan' when you wait, and wait, and wait a bit more to get the next chapter, and you complain a lot because you love that fic and you desperately need this damn chapter in order to go on with your life and stop obsessing over this fic!

*ahem* well, you know. :p

;)

Date: 2006-01-24 04:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Which is precisely why I never did start posting the Sarkney! :p I actually hate doing that to people. What are you waiting on?

And, also. *SCOWLS* See that list up there? Pick a character, and write me a letter. Now! Go on! No excuses whatsoever!

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Date: 2006-01-24 08:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] khylarenelf.livejournal.com
Imagine my wicked, witty, wanting smile
as I say these wanton words to you:
"She is beauty, like the night"
and I'm right, for your beauty, like your name, is like the moon.

Not bad for a Welton man, eh?

XOXO

Nuwanda

Date: 2006-01-25 02:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Not bad for any sort of a man, my darling poet. You do have a way with words, I've missed hearing you. The bed is rather cold without you in it, and your wicked, witty, wanting smile to warm me up.

Fan'

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Date: 2006-01-25 01:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] heikki-cheren.livejournal.com
Hmmm.... I knew something felt wrong. But when I reread the text yesterday before posting, I saw "get a message from" so I thought I had misread or whatever.
Just found out the next line mentionned "letter".
Sorry. :-/

Date: 2006-01-25 02:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
No worries! I can well do with having Methos at my place instead of writing me a letter. ;)

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Date: 2006-01-25 03:23 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Sigh... I managed about a sentence and a half of Jack-like speak before I dried up. Maybe I'll try again in the morning!

Writer's block is evil.

*passing hug*

Date: 2006-01-25 03:46 pm (UTC)
randomling: A wombat. (Default)
From: [personal profile] randomling
Double sigh, it logged me out again!

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Date: 2006-01-26 02:55 pm (UTC)
randomling: A wombat. (Default)
From: [personal profile] randomling
Now then. Correspondence. Let's see.

Letter from... No, leave that one to Rose. Couple of data-cubes from the 32nd century, nothing to be done about those. Distress calls, all dealt with. And Rose is asleep. Okay.

Ah, yeah. Fan. From Paris, 21st century, right - I remember you. Hello!

Good to get your letter. Funny how things always seem to filter down somehow, it was UNIT passed this on in the end. They need to cut down on the paperwork, though. Not much use to you if I get it in sixty years' time, is it?

Anyway, to answer your question: I'm not sure it's such a good idea to write about what you saw and put it on the internet. No, not even if you turn it into a story. First off, there are a fair few people out there who take the phrase "cleaning up" too seriously, and second, you don't want thrillseekers piling up. Anyone who goes looking for danger... well, they tend to get more than they bargained for, and you don't want to get caught up in that sort of trouble again. Do you?

If you want to talk about it, there's people who'll believe you. Honest. And they're not all soldiers - you're right, you probably wouldn't get a lot of moral support out of UNIT anyway. Look up a bloke called Mickey Smith in London. Or maybe Sarah Jane Smith (no relation). They'll set you straight.

Take care of yourself, Fan. You'll be okay. Remember: Tout casse, tout lasse, tout passe.

Yours ever,

The Doctor

Date: 2006-01-27 03:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] fan-elune.livejournal.com
Dear Doctor,

But there's such potential for great story-telling in yours! In fact, I was confiding in a dear Welsh friend of mine that happens to be a TV writer, and he agreed. Thought there was even material for a series here, and they can't very well shut down a series once it's set and working. Said a friend of his was absolutely perfect for your part, and I had to agree.

I hope you don't terribly mind. I'll certainly look Mickey and Sarah Jane up, maybe they'll agree to be consultants on the show?

I'll never forget you, Doctor, and Russell and I will do our best to make sure nobody else ever does.

Fan'

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